Gratitude vs. 2020
Our designated annual day of thanks and gratitude has come and gone for this year. 2020 has presented extraordinary challenges to the concept of thankfulness. It has now been 20 years since the United Nations General Assembly declared the entire year to be the “year of thanksgiving” out of recognition of the benefit to mental health that the practice of gratitude serves. Perhaps a year of thanks has no place in 2020... or perhaps this is the perfect year to remember the old adage that “every cloud has a silver lining”. In the midst of unprecedented hardships within to our day-to-day lives - disruptions to our routines, socially distancing from our loved ones, adapting to working from home and doing really all things from home, not to mention having far fewer breaks from our children and taking on the new role of online educator for our school-age kids... perhaps taking stock of “the little things” is just what the doctor ordered.
What Gives?
The benefit of practicing gratitude is very well-established in the world of psychological research with gratitude being identified as an essential component to one's well-being. There has been consistent evidence linking gratitude with levels of subjective happiness, sense of well-being, positive affect, life satisfaction, peace of mind, more satisfying relationships, and decreased symptoms of depression, lower levels of stress, and even improved sleep. Additionally, secondary benefits have been suggested as outcomes of engaging in gratitude practices such as, improved self-esteem, coping, and recall of positive memories, greater morality, goal-orientation, resourcefulness, and physical health and the reduction in one's strivings for materialistic gains as well as in the tendency to compare self to others, an experience that often generates toxic emotions such as envy and greed.
Considering that practicing gratitude comes as a no-cost strategy with a big pay-off, perhaps this is something we should be taking “stock” in!
What is Gratitude?
Gratitude can be described as the process of attending to and appreciating the unentitled benefits that one receives.
Gratitude has been associated with descriptions such as an emotion, a disposition, or a characteristic, and it is generally well-accepted a being a virtue. Although we may not come by virtues innately or easily, they can nevertheless be cultivated with practice. Easier said than done perhaps to the human who is hard-wired to lean on the side of negativity and who has been observed to exhibit greater (negative) emotional intensity upon experiencing a situation of loss or deprivation compared to how one would react as a result of gaining something that one did not have before (positively). Expecting the worst acts as a defense mechanism geared toward safety and survival. Making an intentional effort to turn our mind to gratitude and the bright-side of a situation may not come as second nature.
The Give & Take
Despite the difficulty that we are up against when we wish to achieve an attitude of gratitude in our lives, the good news is that the benefits of a gratitude practice can develop with ease.
~Research has shown that engaging in any activity that involves self-discipline seems to promote psychological well-being. When we're doing one thing (that promotes wellness) we're not doing something else (ie. spending time in a state of anxiety or depression).
~Gratitude is a free and simple way to make significant life improvements without much time constraint or commitment such as some of the other effective wellness practices we engage in (ie. going to the gym).
~The opportunities for gratitude can be plentiful when considering that this practice can include reflection on both the present as well as in retrospect.
~The practice of gratitude also includes giving to others (without expecting gratitude from recipients).
~Gratitude can be applied to a multitude of circumstances, people, things, events, non-humans, moments, material objects, or self.
~Gratitude can be beneficial as a regular/daily practice or as an intervention during an experience with distressing emotions.
How-to Gratitude
Reflection
Attend to, appreciate, and seek to attain sources of gratitude. Reflection alone has been suggested to be the most effective method of gratitude in order to reap optimal benefit of the experience without taking away from it by writing during reflection.
3, 2, 1
List 3 good things that happened today or in the past, 2 people who you feel grateful for today, and one circumstance that you are looking forward to. Alternatively, complete this activity around the dinner table each evening with additional family members.
Write a Letter
Generate a letter or digital message that can be given to another person for whom you feel grateful and perhaps take it one step further and plan a visit to read or summarize the letter to the person outlining your experience of what you received from them. This second step generates additional benefit that goes along with connecting with another human-being during a social interaction. Gratitude can be expressed to other humans or to non-human sources (to your pet, about the fact that you got to have an entire shower today without your kids interrupting to inquire about snacks!, etc.)
Look for Opportunities to Feel Grateful
Notice and comment when someone holds the door for you, when your spouse picks up all the items on your grocery list, when the weather is nice enough to lure you outside for an opportunity of sunshine absorption!
Give and You Shall.... cultivate an attitude of gratitude
Gratitude can easily transform into a lifestyle. Practice doing one thing each day for another, without any expectation in return. Keep the circle of gratitude going around.
Your Best-Self
Reflect on and/or write about times that you were at your best and identify the personal attributes that you displayed in the situation. Commit to using these identified strengths in some way again tomorrow.
Self-gratitude
Complete the renowned character strengths questionnaire offered by the VIA Institute on Character at www.viacharacter.org . This is a popular and free questionnaire that requires only some basic, anonymous information from its participants used only for research purposes (demographics of those using the survey). The survey takes 20-25 minutes to complete and generates results of your top 5 character strengths.
Once you have this information at your finger tips, reflect on your signature strengths and try using one of your top strengths in a new way each day!
Filling the Void
Perhaps it is not in the midst of happiness and solitude that a practice of gratitude is most valuable ... but rather in times of challenge, in deprivation, that counting our blessings can best serve us.